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10 THINGS NOT TO DO IN JANUARY
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Copyright The Quipping Queen 2006.

10 THINGS NOT TO DO DURING THE MONTH OF JANUARY

Or, pray tell, why not?

Sherlock Tidpit, (a remarkable rumpus-room monitor and a rule-of-thumb rapscallion with a skewed view of reality),is a valuable vestigial remnant

in the Court of the Quipping Queen.

It occurred to me the other day, (as I sat on a tuffet eating my curds and whey), that there are at least TEN things that should never (and I repeat NEVER) be contemplated, considered or carried out during the first month of the year.

1. Make resolutions to be good, bad or downright ugly. (It's a waste of valuable time that could be devoted to building sandcastles in the air, launching trial balloons, twiddling one's thumbs and last but not least, counting some sheep at bedtime).

2. Wear red. (It's a highly over-rated color and should only be worn in an emergency or during the biggest and longest spendthrift season of the year!)

3. Commune with nature ...in particular, with bears or plants. (Like #1, it's not a productive use of one's energies, considering that both of these living things can't hear a blooming thing you say ...'cause they're indisposed ...taking a long winter nap!)

4. Discovering the true personality of a "seagoat". (Do you really want to know that Capricorns are critical, egotistical, fatalistic, status seeking not to mention slave-driving, dissatisfied perfectionists who only believe that their way is always the best ...so there!)

5. Whistle while you work. (This is a sign of true contentment, a ticket-boo state of affairs, or other hunky-dory stuff

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